Kath, I've just joined this forum. I'm almost ten years older than you are. I'm preparing a book on sexual morality for publication, and I was going to attach the chapter on the issue you asked about. Unfortunately it's more KB than this site will permit. So I guess if you'd like to read it, you'll have to send a request to nhpcoop@yahoo.ca
It's from a Roman Catholic point of view, but the good news is that there are some Catholics who consider themselves progressive.
Noel