Hi everyone,
i'd like to introduce myself. In the beginning I want to apologise for my terrible English. It's not my native language and I don't use it daily.
I was raised in formally catholic family but indifferent religiously. I was interested in philosophy but I couldn't decide who is right. Catholic church was totally boring and strtange institution to me.
One day I I had strange impulse to read New Testament. I finished it in 2 weeks and experienced "new born", but without languages and other "miracles". I believed in all Scripture and started to looking for place to worship God. I joined darbysts [closed brethren, dispensationalists] and spent there about 7 years. They are very strict to their doctrine and with time I feeled very limited by them. I was interested in christian mystics, buddhist meditation and for them they were heretic practices.
One day I quit and went to catholic church. But CC also has stupid set of doctrines with their Mary, saints, meat wafer etc. year after year I struggled between catholicism and protestantism and in the and in the end I almost approached the agnosticism. Bible has no more literal sense to me, was full of cruelty and fairy tales, no better then other "holy books". Then i discovered, that I'm not alone in my doubts and there are some movements like progressive christians, liberal christians, christian universalist, emerging movement etc. Now I can see, that one can believe in God and Jesus without pocket of foolish doctrines, without believing in fairy tales, treating Bible like story of relationships people with God, sometimes inspiring, sometimes silly.
Now I'm explore post-christianity doctrine and do not impose myself strict set of dotrines. I'm still seeking.