I worry about God a lot.
My story is probably similar to a lot of people's. My parents are sweet, devout, but fairly conservative Christians. They weren't very communicative about what exactly they believed or expected from us with regard to religion. Poor communication is kind of a tradition in my family. :/ We also switched churches a lot, so that I don't have a "home" tradition.
We also have anxiety. Whether it's genetic or learned behavior, several members of my immediate family, including myself, are on anti-anxiety meds. Therapy and meds have helped me deal with a lot of my fears, but I still don't know what to do about God.
I don't know what God wants from me, and I'm hounded by a feeling that he wants something from me that I'm not doing. I spend almost all of my time taking care of my daughter and wife, so I don't know what else I could do, but that doesn't matter. I can't read the Bible, because I feel like ever verse is accusing me. I'm technically a member of a church, but I rarely go because I don't know what to say to the people there. I pray every day, but it doesn't do a lot of good.
All of which is a huge downer. Sorry! I don't even want to be a Christian; I just want to draw and hang around with my friends and family. But I can't stop obsessing about God.
I'm kind of a basket case.