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One Day At A Time


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It can feel surreal when you've been breezing along, strands of attention and thoughts and actions and energies cast about here and there, some near, some far out into the world, going about daily life attending to a variety of responsiblities, relationships, activites, conversations, projects...

...and then suddenly, sometimes in an instant, sometimes unfolding over a course of hours or days, something, or even some things, happen in life, your own and/or others' around you, and you find yourself without even thought or planning to it, snapping those outstretched strands back toward center, withdrawing from external balancing acts at multi-tasking, to seek to center, to pull your focus in tight, on any crisis of the moment....something like, perhaps, the relaxed, casually grazing band of deer, or wild horses, scattered loosely across the expanse of a grassy meadow, that upon some sensing of the presence of potential danger, suddenly snap to attention, drawing quickly into a tightened circle, all looking this way and that, seeking....at once, both the source of the alarm, and the range of potential responses...the sweet tender blades of grass that held their interest only a moment ago now of no interest at all..

I am experiencing some of that lately, just as the deer too will eventually turn their attention back to grazing, when the alarm has passed, so too I know the things that had been holding my attention a few days ago will again, when the present reasons have resolved...I haven't, at least as yet, put my Christi Lane "One Day at a Time" on continuous replay, as I have done in some times past, but the thought of which of my music strorage drawers I might have placed it into the last time it was played, have begun to cross my mind. There are other select pieces of music that occupy such symbolic place for me, that I turn to them only at certain times, that speak to me a certain thing I need at certain times, a few that I hope and pray I never feel like playing again in the course of my life. "One Day at a Time" isn't nearly so powerfully signficant as that, but significant enough to accompany my withdrawing my focus tightly toward center in response to a life situation.

I suppose others may, as I, have a little (or big) storage bin somewhere in the back of the mind where as assortment of "adages to live by" are kept neatly tucked away, to be pulled out at times appropriate to each...

One of mine is, "Know that this, too, shall pass." Appropriate for now, as well as the words of the Serenity Prayer.

This is one of those things in which there is really nothing I can do...it doesn't directly impact my own daily life routines...and sometimes those things can be the hardest to know how to handle...we, or at least I, anyway, are just geared to DOING something...its really hard to just stay back, quiet, out of the way, knowing only those involved can do anything, have to work it out for themselves. I feel as a mother whose young are under attack, but there is nothing I can fight, nothing I can try to drive away, nothing I can try to make turn loose of my little ones, so that life can go back to normal for everyone...

I look for distractions, but nothing holds my attention, so I turn to trivialities, piddling things, start out to water the plants again, before I remember it rained just yesterday....

That stupid stray dog I rescued from the highway last Friday probably needs to be walked and watered again....yes, that's it, I'll go walk and water the stray dog again...and check the horse's water, too, while i'm at it....again...



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