Hello Everyone - I'm new to the discussion boards but not new to Bishop Spong, and I'm thankful to be here.
I am a survivor of clergy sexual misconduct in the UMC (our former pastor was my mentor as I was leading a large Bible study and took every opportunity to make sexual innuendos or outright comments, so I involved the Bishop, and he was suspended - should've been defrocked, but that's for another discussion). We left that church and went to one in the ELCA, told the husband and wife pastors what had happened to me and was assured that I was "safe" there. Six months later, the male pastor resigned due to - wait for it - clergy sexual abuse. We left that church and landed in a totally different denomination, met with the pastor after we'd been attending for 1.5 years, told him my story and explained that, while we'd be faithful attenders, we would never join. Within minutes he made a comment about my appearance - with my husband sitting there. We've not been back to that church since, and it's been months.
My husband and children want nothing to do with any church; I think we all have PTSD from these things. I was raised in the church and never thought I'd be without it, and it frankly frightens me to be without it - but I'm not sure why. I wanted to raise our kids in the church - and our youngest (in elementary school) has not been baptized. We just don't trust pastors in general any more. What do we do from here? I feel lost without a church community (my husband never wants to return to one). I don't know how to be a Christ follower without a community; aren't we *supposed* to be in community?
What to do from here???
