There aren't a lot of places for a transgender fourteen year old, even less for one who is also bisexual and even a smaller amount for a Christian one. I grew up in a strict atheist home where science was law and organized religion was looked down upon. When I came out to my mother as transgender the May of last year, she took it very poorly. I was mentally abused for months in my own home, and that was around the time where He took up the gaps of love that my mother left.
I still haven't read the entire Bible yet (I'm working on that right now, though). I don't own a cross, or any indication of my faith other than a paperback Bible that I bought when my school's photography club visited the flea market in the city for a field trip (which is hidden between my springboard and mattress when I go home on breaks). I haven't been baptized, nor have I set foot in a Christian chapel in over three years. I'm far from the typical Christian, but I believe in God, He gives me courage and wisdom and I know that he loves me for who I am.
I was hesitant to join a Christian forum before, because I was struggling with reconciling my sexuality and gender identity with my belief in God. I read lots of essays about being gay and Christian, but none about being transgender and Christian. However, one essay quoted a verse that struck a chord with me. Psalm 139:13 says "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb." I thought on that quote for several months and finally was able to make sense of it. He created me exactly how I am supposed to be, bisexual, transgender and all, and I am not sinning for being myself.
I believe that He gave me this body that is incongruent with my inner self and tasked me with making the two match up. He told me that if I was able to be strong bear this burden, then I'd be a better person because of it. So in my eyes, I believe God made me exactly the way he meant to. I'm not a mistake, because He does not make mistakes. I don't know why I was chosen to bear this burden, but I am faithful that I will be a better man on the other side of my journey.
Thank you for listening to my story, and allowing me to ramble on for a few paragraphs.