[bobve2]

I am sending a note to ask for prayer and support. This community of christians has become a large support group for me. While we were off the air for a while and there has been a slow down in activity I still know there are many fellow progressives out there that continue to read as well as post on this site. My 30 year daughter has become active in an ugly divorce proceeding with a powerful, narcissistic, abusive man that is fighting her for her 2 year old boy. He is using the mask of a fundamentalist christian lifestyle to form his side, if you will, and is a wolf in sheeps clothing to say the least. Our whole local community is a very evangelical fundamental community so this site is my place to feel safe and vent my need for prayer and support. thank you ahead of time. Bob ve

[flowperson]

bobve2, on Aug 19 2007, 09:52 AM, said:

I am sending a note to ask for prayer and support. This community of christians has become a large support group for me. While we were off the air for a while and there has been a slow down in activity I still know there are many fellow progressives out there that continue to read as well as post on this site. My 30 year daughter has become active in an ugly divorce proceeding with a powerful, narcissistic, abusive man that is fighting her for her 2 year old boy. He is using the mask of a fundamentalist christian lifestyle to form his side, if you will, and is a wolf in sheeps clothing to say the least. Our whole local community is a very evangelical fundamental community so this site is my place to feel safe and vent my need for prayer and support. thank you ahead of time. Bob ve

Having been through this myself twice, I can surely empathize with your family's situation. Remember, children are not property and in the end they will always recognize who really loves them. We'll all hold you and your family in our thoughts, hearts, and prayers.

flow....

[bobve2]

flowperson, on Aug 19 2007, 04:21 PM, said:

Having been through this myself twice, I can surely empathize with your family's situation. Remember, children are not property and in the end they will always recognize who really loves them. We'll all hold you and your family in our thoughts, hearts, and prayers.

flow....

thanks-flow-I appreciate your support. bob ve

[McKenna]

bobve2, on Aug 19 2007, 12:52 PM, said:

I am sending a note to ask for prayer and support. This community of christians has become a large support group for me. While we were off the air for a while and there has been a slow down in activity I still know there are many fellow progressives out there that continue to read as well as post on this site. My 30 year daughter has become active in an ugly divorce proceeding with a powerful, narcissistic, abusive man that is fighting her for her 2 year old boy. He is using the mask of a fundamentalist christian lifestyle to form his side, if you will, and is a wolf in sheeps clothing to say the least. Our whole local community is a very evangelical fundamental community so this site is my place to feel safe and vent my need for prayer and support. thank you ahead of time. Bob ve

I too love this community and draw support from it even though as you said there hasn't been much activity recently. I am sorry your family is dealing with this, and I will certainly keep you in my prayers, as will the rest of this community I am sure.

[canajan, eh?]

bobve2, on Aug 19 2007, 12:52 PM, said:

I am sending a note to ask for prayer and support. This community of christians has become a large support group for me. While we were off the air for a while and there has been a slow down in activity I still know there are many fellow progressives out there that continue to read as well as post on this site. My 30 year daughter has become active in an ugly divorce proceeding with a powerful, narcissistic, abusive man that is fighting her for her 2 year old boy. He is using the mask of a fundamentalist christian lifestyle to form his side, if you will, and is a wolf in sheeps clothing to say the least. Our whole local community is a very evangelical fundamental community so this site is my place to feel safe and vent my need for prayer and support. thank you ahead of time. Bob ve

Hi, Bob ve. You're going through a lot, and I hope we'll be able to help a bit. Your heart must be breaking to think of your grandson and your daughter being caught up in such a nasty dispute. We're thinking of you. Let us know what we can do to help.

Best, Jen

[bobve2]

canajan, eh?, on Aug 20 2007, 06:31 PM, said:

Hi, Bob ve. You're going through a lot, and I hope we'll be able to help a bit. Your heart must be breaking to think of your grandson and your daughter being caught up in such a nasty dispute. We're thinking of you. Let us know what we can do to help.

Best, Jen

Just sensing the empathy and concern is what I need. It is just unbelievable with just a short note that all of you have a sense for what is going on. I will keep you posted and I really appreciate and need your support. thank again Bob ve

[bobve2]

McKenna, on Aug 19 2007, 09:02 PM, said:

I too love this community and draw support from it even though as you said there hasn't been much activity recently. I am sorry your family is dealing with this, and I will certainly keep you in my prayers, as will the rest of this community I am sure.

Thanks Mckenna-your support is much appreciated and needed. I have received a lot of support from this site already, I wish I had a local community to get this type of support from. This group had really motivated me to try to move forward in the proper manner and I am going to help my family grow spiritually from this. Thanks for your continued support. Sincerely Bob ve PS I also enjoy your many upbeat and uplifting additions to this site.

[McKenna]

bobve2, on Aug 21 2007, 10:51 PM, said:

Thanks Mckenna-your support is much appreciated and needed. I have received a lot of support from this site already, I wish I had a local community to get this type of support from. This group had really motivated me to try to move forward in the proper manner and I am going to help my family grow spiritually from this. Thanks for your continued support. Sincerely Bob ve PS I also enjoy your many upbeat and uplifting additions to this site.

Aw, thank you Bob! This comment made me feel better as well It is nice having a community to go to for support, even if it is virtual!

Keeping you in my prayers

[bobve2]

I just wanted to fill you in. My daughter continues to struggle with her nacissistic husband with definite "anti-social personality disorder". She has her high times and low times. They have a two year old and are seperated. The most difficult thing for me is that she cannot cope with his lies in the community and the lack of understanding that people have for someone going through this. A few people think that people with APD are normal and have a conscience. Does any one have ideas on ways of coping with this. thanks. PS If you haven't heard of APD(which I hadn't until June), learn about it and run the other direction. Also, thanks for your support and if you have the chance support anyone going through any situations which have a need for mercy and grace go the extra mile. thank God for this site.

[JosephM]

bobve2, on Oct 14 2007, 09:49 PM, said:

I just wanted to fill you in. My daughter continues to struggle with her nacissistic husband with definite "anti-social personality disorder". She has her high times and low times. They have a two year old and are seperated. The most difficult thing for me is that she cannot cope with his lies in the community and the lack of understanding that people have for someone going through this. A few people think that people with APD are normal and have a conscience. Does any one have ideas on ways of coping with this. thanks. PS If you haven't heard of APD(which I hadn't until June), learn about it and run the other direction. Also, thanks for your support and if you have the chance support anyone going through any situations which have a need for mercy and grace go the extra mile. thank God for this site.

Hello Bob,

It seems to me that to be healed from our struggles we have to look at ourselves rather than the other person. We can't directly change others but sometimes coping requires acceptance of that which is. At the risk of sounding 'cold' Perhaps your daughter can accept responsibility for her own response to her "nacissistic husband" . Sometimes it seems we need to realize that we are responsible for our own response to attacks and not allow the other person power over our own well-being.

Just a thought to consider and my best wishes for her resolve of this issue you mention.

Love and Peace,
JM

[McKenna]

bobve2, on Oct 14 2007, 09:49 PM, said:

I just wanted to fill you in. My daughter continues to struggle with her nacissistic husband with definite "anti-social personality disorder". She has her high times and low times. They have a two year old and are seperated. The most difficult thing for me is that she cannot cope with his lies in the community and the lack of understanding that people have for someone going through this. A few people think that people with APD are normal and have a conscience. Does any one have ideas on ways of coping with this. thanks. PS If you haven't heard of APD(which I hadn't until June), learn about it and run the other direction. Also, thanks for your support and if you have the chance support anyone going through any situations which have a need for mercy and grace go the extra mile. thank God for this site.

Thanks for giving us an update! I'm sorry that the situation is still impacting your daughter so negatively I sincerely hope things start looking up for her, that the situation starts to be resolved...I know it must be hard.

[Cynthia Sheldon]

bobve2, on Oct 14 2007, 07:49 PM, said:

I just wanted to fill you in. My daughter continues to struggle with her nacissistic husband with definite "anti-social personality disorder". She has her high times and low times. They have a two year old and are seperated. The most difficult thing for me is that she cannot cope with his lies in the community and the lack of understanding that people have for someone going through this. A few people think that people with APD are normal and have a conscience. Does any one have ideas on ways of coping with this. thanks. PS If you haven't heard of APD(which I hadn't until June), learn about it and run the other direction. Also, thanks for your support and if you have the chance support anyone going through any situations which have a need for mercy and grace go the extra mile. thank God for this site.

Sorry to hear about what each of you are going through. I will pray for you. I divorced 9 years ago from someone who was terribly cruel, a pathological liar with problems with drugs, alcohol, theft, guns, a suicide attempt, bankruptcy, domestic abuse to atleast 3 women, and false accusations. Many of these things I didn't find out about until after the divorce. He had a habit of finding a new conservative church and telling everyone he changed, but it never lasted, even with caring supportive people giving him a place to live and trying to help him. I had so much help and support from my family and my pastor. Through healing and counseling, I learned to choose a completely different type of person and I'm so glad I did. I am very happily married now. My ex-husband finally got caught driving under the influence. He got out on bail and never showed up for court, so there is a warrant for his arrest. He can cause very little problems for us now and I'm so glad we no longer have to suffer his anger outbursts and threats. My daughter remembers what it was like to have to visit him and she is old enough to know now that she never wants to see or talk to him again.
Just continue praying. Right before he got caught, I could feel God telling me that something would be happening so that our problems with him would be over. Don't give up on prayer.

[bobve2]

Cynthia Sheldon, on Oct 16 2007, 06:54 PM, said:

Sorry to hear about what each of you are going through. I will pray for you. I divorced 9 years ago from someone who was terribly cruel, a pathological liar with problems with drugs, alcohol, theft, guns, a suicide attempt, bankruptcy, domestic abuse to atleast 3 women, and false accusations. Many of these things I didn't find out about until after the divorce. He had a habit of finding a new conservative church and telling everyone he changed, but it never lasted, even with caring supportive people giving him a place to live and trying to help him. I had so much help and support from my family and my pastor. Through healing and counseling, I learned to choose a completely different type of person and I'm so glad I did. I am very happily married now. My ex-husband finally got caught driving under the influence. He got out on bail and never showed up for court, so there is a warrant for his arrest. He can cause very little problems for us now and I'm so glad we no longer have to suffer his anger outbursts and threats. My daughter remembers what it was like to have to visit him and she is old enough to know now that she never wants to see or talk to him again.
Just continue praying. Right before he got caught, I could feel God telling me that something would be happening so that our problems with him would be over. Don't give up on prayer.

Thanks Cynthia and Mckenna and the rest. I respect your comments and really appreciate the support. bob ve

[flowperson]

Bob...All I can say is that evil is everywhere and it always attacks the innocent in the most vicious ways.

The few of us that are still here and still care about each other are with you and yours. You are in our prayers and hopes.

Eventually this horror that you are enduring will burn itself out and you and those that you love will be allowed to turn your backs upon the immediacies of it all and walk away to start anew, but not without some scars.

G-d be and go with you all my friend.

Hi Cynthia...it all sounds so familiar *shudder*.

flow....

[bobve2]

flowperson, on Oct 17 2007, 10:50 AM, said:

Bob...All I can say is that evil is everywhere and it always attacks the innocent in the most vicious ways.

The few of us that are still here and still care about each other are with you and yours. You are in our prayers and hopes.

Eventually this horror that you are enduring will burn itself out and you and those that you love will be allowed to turn your backs upon the immediacies of it all and walk away to start anew, but not without some scars.

G-d be and go with you all my friend.

Hi Cynthia...it all sounds so familiar *shudder*.

flow....

This support means a lot to me. I too, miss the many people that we used to be able to communicate with but I really appreciate those that are hear. I sense that those that have left are still with us in spirit and will return. thanks again. bob ve