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5. Do you believe that you behave as a follower of Jesus most of the time; some of the time; or now and then?
Not nearly enough. And from the statistics around it would seem I'm not alone. We are all of us wounded, sinful, fallen, crippled, you choose the metaphor. Which has given me a clear and unambiguous mandate:
I should be spending my time working on my own behavior and not on the behavior of others!
I am in no place to criticize anyone for their sex lives, their social habits, who they sleep with, the books they read, etc. Because I am in no wise in a better place than anyone. I am struggling, I am doing the best I can and look at the mess I am. How do I dare judge anyone else?
The ancient Desert Fathers, with all their failings had this right. The ideal was to be harder on ones self than on others. A story is as follows:
Abba Moses was invited to a meeting of all the hermits. A brother was found to have been sinning seriously and they were going to sit in judgement on him as a community. When Abba Moses showed up he was carrying a huge sack. He came in, sat down and opened the sack, which turned out to be full of pebbles. He began to count the pebbles "1,2,3 . . . ". Out of respect the other brothers waited a while, then one of them approached him:
"Excuse me, Abba, but we have to begin the trial of this brother."
"Oh not yet," said Abba Moses, "how can I judge his sins until I'm finished counting my own? 3003,3004,3005 . . ."
After a while, Abba Moses looked up and found all the other brothers had left and there was no more talk of judging the brother.

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